Keystone Dance Theory

I have a theory.  check it out

when i go dancing, i go alone.  I don't know who's going to be there.  I hope for a room full of hotties, but generally, its old couples and randos.  but as long as there are good dancers, i always have fun.  I attribute this to my original dance rules: 1) if we (my partner and I) don't fall down, its a success  2) more laughing = more fun  3) whenever possible, let the woman be sexy (this is key.  don't get in her way.  very key).
so, thats great.  generally people love dancing with me because i'm so low key and enthusiastic and such.  as i've said many times, the old ladies love me.  i'm nonthreatening to them, and they let me be silly, its wonderful.

On monday, i found my new wcs spot.  (i can't remember if I've mentioned I have moved back to the Bay Area.  I did though).  it has a really great range of dancers, lots of fun exciting people, and a pretty good lesson where I picked up some things.  so i'm dancing along, having fun.  and i come to a realization.

just like in an ecosystem, a dance floor has a keystone species.  That is, there is a species from which the entire network connects to.  for dancing, this can be recognized as the oldest young girl at the event.  here's why.  as a young person, i'm always looking to dance with young girls.  they're so scarce, its a treat when they exist.  (as i've touched on in previous entries, young people don't do partner dancing.  theres no place for it in clubs and so its just not a thing.  further, single girls would never go alone to a dance lesson/event.  think about how hard it is to go places and be alone in general, now imagine doing it in a setting with shared personal space, strange men.  just doesn't happen.  i get it)  so when they're there, its a wonderful thing.

however, the young girls are also attractive dance partners for old guys too.  i can't describe it, but somehow dancing does attract weird old guys.  most all of them are nice, but often they're really good at dancing, have a sort of swagger, and would be the sorts of strangers i'd be nervous about intially.  now, they're all cool eventually, but first impression are what they are.  however, being maybe past their prime, they want to feel young, and so they want to dance with the young gals too.  i don't doubt its also that young girls at dance events must be good or they'd not have come at all.  so the guys want to dance with great dancers.  i get that, i do too.

so, the potential character to be the center of the dance network are young girls.  however, i notice its generally the oldest of the set of young girls.  she never gets to sit down.  everyone wants to dance with here.  i presume this fact is because the old dudes don't want to be seen as mingling too young and the young guys like older women maybe. i don't know, i just observe and hypothesize.

I should also mention.  beauty and looks play very minimally into this.  although i'm making gross assumptions for this entire argument, the following is my own opinion.  while i'd love to dance with a hottie, i'll dance with a great dancer over a hot beginner any day.  Dancing with sean (a crazy good dancer from dartmouth) can be more fun than a leading a first timer. 

SO, back to the theory.  having been versed in Game theory, i decided to try and dance with the secondary keystone dancer.  genius right?  still a young, great follower, but less hard to get a hold of than the alpha keystone girl.
man i'm smart.  whoosh

however, as luck would have it, she was a total brat.  she didn't really want to dance, that was clear the second we started dancing.  i was pulling out all my moves, my laughing, everything.  I can truly say i've never danced with someone who made the dance not enjoyable.  until this dance.  it was astounding.

so what i realized was.  fuck her.  i'm a ton of fun to dance with.  great, you're not hurting my feelings by declining to dance with me, you're just wearing lead boots and a droopy-angsty-hat the whole dance through.  sweet deal.

after this i danced with the keystone girl and guess what.  she was amazing.  so my theory was proven, but my cheat failed.  or maybe i'm reading too much into nothing. 



also, i seem to do a lot of "oh damn, i'm really a cool dude and who cares what these silly girls think" realizations and then get scared back into taking things personally.  this is why i'm going out tomorrow and being boisterous.  thats the plan.